Winter Break
by Snurtz
Summary: Written in a kind of play formatty thing. The Fellowship decides to stay in Rivendell until spring instead of leaving in December. Slight Pirates of the Caribbean crossover at the end! It's supposed to be really funny.


DISCLAIMER: We ALL know that I don't own any of the characters here. Der. I also don't own Jack Sparrow or Will Turner. Ohhhh, how I wish I did. But I don't.

There was another chapter to this but unfortunately it was on my school laptop and I had to give that back. However I think it was too serious so it's okay.

* * *

Legolas: WHO STOLE MY SHAMPOO? 

Pippin: I did!

Merry: You idiot! RUN!

(Pippin runs to Legolas)

Merry: No! Other direction!

(Too late. Legolas catches Pippin)

Pippin: Uh... hi?

Legolas: WHERE IS MY SHAMPOO?

Pippin: I hid it somewhere...

(Scent of strawberries comes out of the bathroom)

Pippin: Oh yeah! It's in the bathroom!

Frodo (in the bathroom): Sam! What are you doing in here?

Sam: (also in bathroom): Uh... looking for... food?

Gandalf: Oh boy. Sam walked in on Frodo again.

(He leaves to hit Sam with his staff. A thwack is heard. Sam runs out a moment later with a dent in his forehead and runs into his room and locks the door.)

Legolas: WHO IS USING MY SHAMPOO?

Aragorn: (Reading "Monarchy for Dummies") I don't know.

Legolas: Of course YOU don't Aragorn. When the last time you washed YOUR hair?

Aragorn: I don't know.

(A big splash is heard. Gandalf comes back from the bathroom, soaking wet.)

Gandalf: Well... Frodo doesn't like crowded bathrooms.

Sam: (Peeking out from room) Nope. (Hides in room again)

(Legolas, who still has Pippin in a death grip, turns to the bathroom, obviously intent on killing whoever is using his shampoo.)

Legolas: Is Frodo using my shampoo?

Merry: Uh, Legolas, Pippin's turning blue.

(Legolas lets go of Pippin and runs towards the bathroom. Pippin hides under a table. Legolas stomps into the bathroom and closes the door. A shrill battle-shriek is heard, followed by a scream. A moment later, Frodo runs out of the bathroom in only a towel. He runs directly to his room and slams and locks the door. Crazed babbling is heard inside.)

Legolas: Well, I found who's using my shampoo.

Aragorn: Can I use it?

Pippin: (Under table) I thought you were going for a record.

(Aragorn gives Pippin a death-look. Pippin yelps and runs into his room, locking the door behind him.

Gimli: Dudes. Stop scaring the Hobbits.

(Suddenly, Eomer walks into the room.)

Eomer: I would cut off your head, Dwarf, if it stood a little higher from the ground.

Legolas: You would die before your stroke fell!

Merry: Hey! How'd you get in here?

Eomer: Oh. Sorry. (Eomer walks out the door and everyone stands around, confused.)

Gandalf: Uh... does anyone have the latest Britney Spears CD?

Gimli: Oh come on, old man. No one listens to Britney anymore.

Gandalf: They do too.

Gimli: Do not.

Gandalf: Do too.

Gimli: Do not.

Gandalf: Do too.

Gimli: Do not.

Gandalf: Do too.

Gimli: Do not.

Gandalf: Do too.

Gimli: Do not.

Gandalf: Do too.

Gimli: Aragorn, no one listens to Britney Spears anymore. Right?

Aragorn: I don't know.

Legolas: I'm going to take a shower now.

Merry; you just took one an hour ago!

Legolas: Yeah, I know. Then I touched the couch.

(Everyone rolls their eyes. Elrond walks into the room.)

Elrond: So, how is everyone doing?

(A shriek is heard from Frodo's room.)

Frodo: NOOOOOOOOOO!

Legolas: Oops.

Elrond: Well?

Aragorn: I don't know.

Gimli: Is that all you ever say?

Aragorn: I don't know.

(Elrond, seeing that it is hopeless, leaves the room. Legolas walks into the bathroom.)

Merry: Gee, it's so tense in here. Who wants to play Twister?

(Sam pops his head out from his room.)

Sam: OOH! I WANNA PLAY!

(Pippin runs out of his room with the box.)

Gimli: Sounds fun.

Gandalf: I SHALL DEFEAT YOU ALL!

(Everyone waits to see if Aragorn is going to play.)

Merry: Strider? Are you going to play?

Aragorn: I don't know.

Merry: Uh okay... You can do the spinner. Is that ok with you?

(Realizing what he just said, he smacks himself in the forehead.)

Aragorn: I don't know.

(Everyone lines up on the mat. Aragorn spins the spinner.

Aragorn: ...

Gandalf: Well? What is it?

Aragorn: Left foot red.

Pippin: He DOES say something other that "I don't know!"

(Aragorn gives Pippin another death look. Pippin abandons the game for the safety of his room.)

Merry: Uh... how about we postpone the game? It's time for breakfast anyway.

Legolas: (off-key in the bathroom) TO THE SEA TO THE SEA THE WHITE GULLS ARE CRYING!

Gimli: Uh-oh. Legolas is singing in the shower again.

(Everyone covers their ears. Legolas stops singing and comes out of the bathroom to find everyone sitting on the floor with their ears plugged. He shrugs, figuring it's cool, and does the same thing.)

Frodo: (Peeking out of room) Is everything safe?

(Legolas twitches. Frodo yelps and runs back into his room. Elrond reappears.)

Elrond: Time for breakfast!

(Everyone runs out of the room to eat. Frodo peeks out of his room cautiously, and walks closely behind Sam, trying to hide from Legolas. Pippin comes out of his room about 5 minutes later.)

Pippin: Where is everybody? ... Hello? ... Ah well. I'll just sit here and wait.

(Pippin sits down and stares into space for half and hour. Everyone comes back and sees him sitting on the couch. Gandalf comes over and waves his hands over Pippin's eyes. Pippin doesn't move.)

Gandalf: OH MY GOD! HE HAS LOOKED INTO THE PALANTIR!

Merry: What are you talking about?

Gandalf: I don't know.

Legolas: Is he dead?

Gandalf: I don't know.

Aragorn: THAT'S MY LINE!

(Everyone ignores Aragorn.)

Gandalf: Legolas, did you clear the table?'

Legolas: (pretending he can't hear Gandalf) what?

Gandalf: What?

Legolas: Huh?

Gandalf: What?

Lgolas: Oh, forget it.

Gandalf: Forget what?

Legolas: Too late.

Pippin: MONKEY CHEESE!

(Everyone in the room jumps a mile. Pippin starts cracking up until he sees the death looks he's getting. He shrieks and hides behind Frodo, who is hiding behind Sam.)

Later

(Everyone is sitting around on the couches, watching Oprah.)

Pippin: I'm hungry. When's breakfast?

Aragorn: You've already had it.

(Everyone is shocked that Aragorn has spoken.)

Pippin: Not me!

Merry: You loser. You were hiding in your room. It's almost time for dinner now.

(Pippin realizes that he has gone about 6 hours without food. He immediately faints from hunger.)

Merry: Pippin?

Gandalf: He's fine. Give him some food.

(Pippin wakes up again.)

Pippin: Food? Where?

Merry: You idiot.

Pippin: Who's an idiot?

Merry: You are.

Pippin: You?

Merry: No. You.

Pippin: Oh okay, you.

Merry: This is hopeless. Let's go eat.

Pippin: YAY!

(Everyone leaves to go eat dinner.)

Bedtime

(Everyone is in their pajamas, fighting for bathroom rights.)

Legolas: I SHOULD BRUSH FIRST!

Gimli: Brush what?

Legolas: EVERYTHING!

Gandalf: Exactly. Legolas goes last. Aragorn, since you're the dirtiest, do you want to go first?

Aragorn: I don't know.

(Everyone pushes Aragorn into the bathroom. They all brush their teeth, and get in bed.)

Boromir: Good night, everyone.

(All gasp.)

Merry and Pippin: WE THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!

Boromir: Am I not? (Looks over self)

Jack Sparrow: Hey, that's my line!

(Everyone is confused about Jack Sparrow.)

Merry: How'd you get in here?

Boromir: Better question. How did you get dirtier than Aragorn?

Jack: I don't brush my teeth.

Legolas: EWWWWW! STAY AWAY STAY AWAY!

(Legolas runs shrieking into his room.)

Jack: And this is my friend, Will Turner.

(Everyone is amazed to see Will Turner.)

Gimli: Uh... Legolas?

(Legolas walks out of his room.)

Legolas: Wha-AHHHHHHH! WHO IS THAT?

(Legolas has obviously seen Will. He is scared to see someone who looks exactly like him who is dirty. Legolas faints.)'

Will Turner: AYE! AVAST!

(Jack Sparrow and Will Turner leave.)

Boromir: That was weird.

Merry: Yeah. Nitey Nite.

(They all go to bed.)


End file.
